After the epiphany-in-the-car that I wrote about yesterday, I was inspired to take action. (I will wear that little yellow dress again — I will!) I woke up the next morning resolved to go shopping.
I know, I know, what else is new in the world of mommyblogs? But you have to believe me when I say that this is not a common event around our house. My outfits of late have been more from the Functional Playdate line than the Wow, I Feel Cute In This collection. And nothing says fun like functional. So, I called in the troops, bought myself an hour with my closet, and went to work.
Maternity clothes? Banished.
Yoga pants? Burned.
Favorite t-shirts from college? The rag bag. Most of them.
Sweaters that I haven’t worn since my personal thermostat changed post-birth? Donated.
Hilfiger jeans that I bought to celebrate my post-Widget body but now fall down around my hips? In the to-go bag.
Giant nursing tops from the last go-round? Out.
Comfy PJs? In. Are you kidding me? Comfy PJs are always in. I so totally kept those in the rotation. But I did swear to wear them only at night.
All told, I filled 4 large white bags of clothes for the local clothing ministry, and another 2 of things I wouldn’t give my little brother to wear. Hurrah! Clutter and ill-fitting clothes, gone from my life.
The next day, I went shopping. Armed with Susan’s list of essentials, I worked the aisles of my local department store, picking up 2 cute tops, 1 polo shirt (I couldn’t decide if they were in style at all, but it makes me look skinny and I found it in red), 2 pairs of skinny jeans (just in time for them to go out of style, I’m sure) in a dark wash, 2 pairs of these shorts but with a cuff, a gorgeous long swirly skirt in black, summer slides, and even a bit of perfume. It was an amazing couple of hours, and, I have to say, there was something different about shopping this time.
I didn’t feel awkward or fat.
Why? I wish I could tell you. I wish I could lay it out here for all to read, to say that my self-esteem was bucked up by the recent upturn in my business, or the fact that I’m beginning to acept myself as a perfectly good mother, or even that we’ve had grandparents visiting and I felt comfortable leaving my boys in (so many pairs of) good hands. I wish I could put it into words, or bottle it so that I could open it anytime I wished, and, with a quick whiff, feel good about myself and my body again. But I can’t. All I can say is that it was a success.
And in my new clothes, I feel like I’m a success too.