Do you even know

Do you even know how beautiful you are?

As my husband and I waited to be seated at dinner last night, I had the strange experience of feeling invisible while knowing that I was conspicious in my hat and baldness.  The only place to sit was right by the women’s restroom, so dozens of women walked by me, fidgeting, putting their hands to their hair unconsciously, running through their list of things to do as they squeezed in a moment to freshen makeup and put that unruly curl back in place while still getting back to the table in a reasonable amount of time.

Others walked by as they exited, hugging friends, self-consciously running their hands through their own long hair as they made plans to meet again, or dodging a stray wisp that escaped the ubiquitous college ponytail as they laughed and said goodbye to new acquaintances.

I allowed myself a few moments to remember when I had been in their shoes, seemingly carefree and yet not carefree at all.  We as women worry about the most amazing things, don’t we?  We worry about our makeup smudging, our hair falling out of place, the pound or two we gained, or lost, and it’s never good enough, is it?

It should be good enough.  It really should.  Because every woman that walked by me last night was beautiful, and had absolutely beautiful hair.  Long, short, curly, straight, thin, or thick, it was the diversity of hair that made me marvel … there are so many ways to be beautiful.

What I’m trying to say is … Your hair looks great today.

WhyMommy also blogs at DC Metro Moms — after she’s put on her hat and drawn on her eyebrows, of course!


34 Responses to Do you even know

  1. I can’t even begin to imagine how you’re feeling. But I do know that it will grow back and you’ll look back on these days with more appreciation for all that’s around you.

    We take so much for granted don’t we? Little things such as hair are so meaningless in the big picture of life, but when you’re fighting for your life, it’s a big thing.

    For all it’s worth, you’re beautiful just like you are. … and when your hair grows back, you’ll still be you!


  2. Jessica says:

    And you are beautiful too–with or without hair.

  3. ~JJ! says:

    How do you do that?

    You are so beautiful it brings tears to my eyes.

  4. Two Shews says:

    Do you even know how beautiful YOU ARE?

    Passionately Pink for the Cure is going great– I am already halfway to my first goal ($200) in the first four days. Thanks for inspiring me.

  5. Ree says:

    Aw sweetie. Tears. But believe me, good hair days/bad hair days/no hair days….you are one of the most beautiful people I know.

  6. Ohio Jodi says:

    I am so happy I’ve made it this far in life and with good health. I always thought I’d get at tatoo on my head if I lost my hair…maybe the cancer ribbon, or cancer sucks etc. Nominate yourself to win $80,000, your blog is awesome. It seem authentic and if nothing else you could buy a Brittney Spears wig with the money. Huggs and you still need to place the code for lolo on blog.

  7. deb says:

    Thanks for putting things into perspective and reminding to appreciate ordinary things. Take care sweetie.

  8. canape says:

    Why thank you, WM. Me and my grey roots thank you very much.

    I can’t wait to see how your hair grows back in – even though you sport your beautiful head very well!

  9. Sandy says:

    Your hair isn’t what makes you beautiful. Or your breasts…or anything else that is “womanly”. Without your hair you are still you, and still beautiful. Without your breasts you would still be you and beautiful.

    Nothing can change that.

  10. Stimey says:

    It’s true. Perspective can make all the difference. It’s so easy to take things for granted until they are gone.

    I know I say this a lot, but You. Are. Beautiful. With or without hair. Last time I saw you I didn’t even notice your eyebrows. You must be doing an excellent job of drawing them in! 🙂

    I hope things were okay today. Much love!

  11. Bon says:

    tears. that flattened me…thank you. for the reminder and the dose of humility, and just…the generosity. beautiful words, given free, to put the whole day in perspective. i needed that velvet kick in the ass.

    i hope your day is all velvet and no kick, and you too know how beautiful you are.

  12. Meleah says:

    You are so beautiful for being able to see the world the way you do. The greatest gift one can ever be given is a shift in perspective or attitude. My children give me that often, but today it was you. Thank you.

  13. Oh, I do so wish you could have seen the looks on the faces of all the people I have shown your photograph to, Whymommy… Everyone who saw my Team Whymommy poster at the Terry Fox Run was just astounded at how truly beautiful you look, with AND without your hair.

    And, when they come and read your blog, they will get to see how truly beautiful you are on the INSIDE, too.

    You’re the Complete Package, my friend.

    Love to you, as always, CGF xo

  14. bubandpie says:

    This just smites me. I’ve been feeling like the most awful frump this week because of the layer of frizz all around my hair (a week of rain will do that). All my life, I’ve focused my emotions and my sense of self on my hair – but I haven’t often tried just noticing how beautiful it is.

  15. FENICLE says:

    You are truly beautiful yourself!

    I wanted to let you know that AlphaMom picked up a link to your IBC post & mine.

    More awareness!!!!

  16. I’ve been trying to think of an appropriate comment all day. I’ve got nothing. All I can think of to say is thank you.

  17. heather says:

    What a great post. Every woman should read this.

  18. Tamara Cosby says:

    You are beautiful, VERY!

  19. clifford says:

    Worry not on the subject, YM. A temporary loss.

    And if anyone cues up that nails-on-chalkboard James Blunt song, I shall make my keyboard beautiful. With tonight’s spaghetti.

  20. Mrs. Chicken says:

    you are beautiful, whymommy.

  21. Ally says:

    I agree with Heather that every woman should read this. You are beautiful, too, WM. I know, cuz I’ve seen the pictures you posted!

  22. Carrie says:

    That was beautiful. YOU are beautiful.

  23. Imstell says:

    You are such a generous woman, WhyMommy. Instead of feeling envious or resentful you simply prove your own beauty by acknowledging other’s. Brava.

  24. magnetobold says:

    You know what? I probably would have looked at you and thought, what a cute hat!
    I can’t wear hats. My head is HUGE! I am always envious of women that can wear a great hat or head scarf. It it would have dawned on me hours later of why you were wearing a hat.
    I have been thinking of you today. Anxiously awaiting news of how the new chemo is making you feel. Sending you warm cuddles and sweet dreams.

  25. Leeanthro says:

    No, you are the beautiful one! On so many levels.

  26. Amy says:

    Oh G-d. You’re so friggin’ right. I feel so shallow. It’s amaing how much power a pimple on the middle of your face can have over your mood… your day.. and how it’s so — nothing!

    Thanks for the wake up call, and just keep being as amazing as you always are!

  27. Kat says:

    Wow…what a great post. Thanks so much for the reminder.

    I linked to you and this post tonight.


  28. Stacie says:

    What a beautiful post.

  29. Angela says:

    Honestly though, not half as beautiful as you are.

    I’m constantly inspired by your strength and your ability to put your experience into words. Words that ARE reaching and touching so many people.

    Keep shining on Whymommy.

  30. wow, thank you for this very encouraging, pull-me-out-of-my-pit post. 🙂
    -here from the COFL

  31. K T Cat says:

    You’re beautiful, too.

  32. Samantha says:

    You’re absolutely right! So much time that we spend worrying about this & that. I wish that every mom could see herself the way her children see her; beautiful, smart, strong and funny.

  33. zamejias says:

    Beautiful post. ANd you’re beautiful too – judging from this post.

  34. Johnny says:

    I was looking for a website of poetry to write down for my new girlfriend and came across your website. It touched my heart and I wanted to wish you luck. Every one of the responders has told you how beautiful you are and I agree. I want to wish you the best! Thanks!!!

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