Good Grief.

Nothing made me laugh today so much as the following letter from my radiologist:

Dear WhyMommy,

According to our records it is time to schedule your breast imaging procedure. 

Be aware that many breast cancers do not produce symptoms.  Early detection requires a combination of monthly breast self-examination, yearly physical breast examination, and a periodic mammography according to your age and physician’s recommendations.  Current American Cancer Society Guidelines recommend screening mammograms and clinical breast exams every year beginning at age 40.

… (and it goes on).

While I appreciate their attention to detail in contacting me one year after my last mammogram, I did let the records office know a couple months ago that I wouldn’t be needing any more breast imaging, as, in fact, I no longer have breasts. 

So I’m chalking this one up in the column labeled “Things I No Longer Have to Worry About,” and instead looking forward to my CTs and other scans in early July — the first scans that will PROVE that I no longer have cancer.  Just in time for BlogHer.

Yippee!

18 Responses to Good Grief.

  1. liz says:

    YAY for July’s CT scans!

    Also, I can only imagine what it was like to be the worker who took your call. I don’t think I could think of an appropriate way to respond. That would definitely be the call I’d hang up from and sit slack-jawed for minute. But surely you’re not the first person to call and say, “Sorry, no boobs!”
    I’m with you and and am glad to see the humor in it. Definitely one less thing to have to worry about!

  2. I’m glad you can see the silver lining. And at least your Dr’s office is thorough in their follow-ups, right?

  3. Radish says:

    Dude, that’s just WRONG. 🙂

  4. Just in time for BlogHer is PERFECT timing.

    Wish I could be there to celebrate with you!!

    xo CGF

  5. sprucehillfarm says:

    I would get a chuckle out of that letter. How did they miss that one? Hee Hee🙂
    At least you can laugh aboutit!

  6. Nicole says:

    Good attitude🙂

    Don’t let the turkeys get you down !!!!!

    xo

  7. Lisa says:

    Lovin’ this one. You are truly the best!
    Thanks for the🙂.

  8. lybl says:

    Your response to the letter is one of a positive attitude. Considering the circumstances most people wouldn’t have responded to an insensitive oversight like this.

    Kudos on that!

  9. Bon says:

    oy, ironies. shaking my head, and smiling back at you, and hoping for perfect proof in July.🙂

  10. D'Lyn says:

    I have a friend that got one of those letters. This was her response…

    Dear Dr. ?????,
    Last Saturday, July 21st, I received a notice (copy enclosed) from your office stating “It’s time to schedule your next appointment with us…” and the Bilateral Mammogram option was checked. You know, with my recent hysterectomy and medically induced menopause, I have this theory that my memory left with my ovaries and neither are coming back. So, am I ever so glad to receive this reminder!

    As such, I would be more than happy to drop off both of my boobs for the bilateral mammogram. All I need to know is which set you would prefer; you have options. I have a nice, smaller set I bought on Ebay for $50.00 (including shipping) and I also have the larger, more expensive pair I bought at Loretta’s Intimates for $575.00.

    So, just let me know which ones you prefer and I’ll get them right over. If I’m running late, do you have a slot in your door I can put them though?

    Seriously, though, I have to say that when I got the notice, I actually laughed out loud. To me, it was almost as humorous as the time I got a call from another doctor’s assistant a few years ago saying they had reviewed the results of my autopsy (she meant biopsy)…..

    Life is Good ~ Celebrate Daily

  11. I guess i have this to look forward to…hee-hee…

    A friend shared your link with me…
    you are a year ahead of me…only just had one chemo cycle and the surgery is about 6 months away…it’s daunting…you are blessed to have a loving husband…i am unfortunately dealing with marital discord as well…the kids keep me going though…blessings to you and a healthy happy life ahead!
    Jodi

  12. Margerie says:

    Good grief. They could have saved the paper and the stamp.

    At my first radiation consult, my radiologist’s receptionist inisisted I watch the “Why Lumpectomies are Better than those Nasty Mastectomies” video. Gee… I really needed to see that (at 38 years young already having mastectomy 4 months earlier- no choice). I pretty uch let him have it when he came in. We made friends after that LOL!

    But enough about me! I hope the time flies in good fun before your scans and not too much scanxiety in July. You might just have to leave cancer in the dust then….🙂

  13. dana wyzard says:

    Ahhh honey. You still need the xrays just to check that lining against your chest wall, but I know how you feel.

    I have an ileostomy (picture a Glad bag hanging off your belly) and in order to look at the GOOD side of that, I just remind myself that I can’t get colon cancer, (NO COLON) and I don’t need to have those horrible sigmoidoscopes and colonoscopies every year.

  14. whymommy says:

    Oh, D’Lyn, that’s too funny! What an awesomely bright response.

    Dana, I have a friend with an ileostomy bag, and I’m always brightened by her smile and easy spirit. (She also brings us boobless ones back down to earth by changing the topic from the trouble finding tank tops with adequate coverage to skirts…)

    This wasn’t a big deal in the scheme of things, but I’m glad so many of you have the same kind of humorous outlook about it that I did!

    Now, off to schedule the REAL scans that I need. Ugh.

  15. naturallyopinionated says:

    Your attitude is great! Sometimes you just have to laugh!

  16. Glad to see you see the humour in it! I had Boo on a waiting list for early intervention. He got the acceptance 5 years later. When he was 3 years too old for the program!

  17. Ally says:

    I love you even more, now that I know you also say “Good Grief.” Truly one of the best phrases ever.

    Hilarious, that letter from the doc. Really.

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