It’s cancer — a local regional recurrence of breast cancer, in the lymph nodes under my armpit. We’ll fight it with surgery in early April and 7 weeks of radiation after that. For now, that’s all we know.
There is a twist. There’s a node that will be difficult to reach with surgery. if the surgeon can’t get it, there it will sit, rendered hopefully impotent by the aromasin I take each morning with my orange juice. There isn’t enough research to show conclusively whether I’ll need chemo too if she can’t reach that node, but my oncologists are both leaning against it.
Once again, I’m amazed at how much we don’t know about diseases that occur in our own bodies. We need the research.
I need the research.
We all need the research — for cancer affects us all.
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Much love and hope to you, as always.
I am so sorry to hear this. It truly sucks. Here’s to a successful surgery and chemo.
stupid cancer.
My heart full of love and hope for you, whydaddy and the boys and the circle of friends there to support you.
*hugs*
Can I try to reach the node? I know it means a drive to Maryland.
F*CK. Kick that damned cancer’s ass.
You will beat this, just as you’ve beaten it (handily!) before.
I am so sorry – I know this is terrifying. Here’s hoping the surgeon can get access.
More nasty words. At least it’s not metastatic disease. Praying for long surgical instruments and God’s guiding hand. Hugs.
You are strong, you can beat this. And I’d be willing to bet that Devra could reach that node.
Fuck cancer. Really.
Strength and peace and love to you.
My heart sinks. Am praying for you and with you. Much love. Peace and strength to you, Whydaddy and the children.
Dammit! But now we know.
I can give Devra a boost so she can reach farther…
love you girl!
Going to get my cancer-kickin boots out from the back of the closet.
Shit. You will beat this. You are strong and will kick cancer’s ass again! Go Team Why Mommy! ((hugs))
I hate this…
I know you can beat this, Susan. I’m just so sorry that you have to endure it. xoxoxoxoxoxo
son of a bitch! Oh, that makes me so mad. You don’t deserve this, dammit.
*hugs* just don’t seem like enough.
All my thoughts, all my love, all my hope, all my everything.
And you know, I’m your in, if you ever, need that thing we talked about. (and no, it is not drugs, get your mind away from the illegal people.)
Damn. I’m sorry, but we’re all standing here behind you to hold you up and help you beat this thing. xo
Aw shit, I’m sorry! We’ll all fight with you!!
Shit, shit, shit.
You will beat this. We will be here cheering you on.
You’ve been on my mind lately so I wanted to visit your site and catch up. And I’m so sorry to hear this. Am off to find a can o’ “whoop-ass” you can unleash on the vile thing. You know you’ve got a ton of peeps in Breese who are cheering you on. (And in STL too!)
Damn. Praying for you as you begin this new fight.
Thankful that you have such a great team behind you and proud to be part of it!
Cancer’s days are numbered…
*sigh* I am so sorry you have to deal with all this again. Cancer sucks….
I am so sorry, sweetie. This really sucks. Can the local bloggers take care of meals?
Sigh. Hating this for you. Inspired by your fighting attitude and amazing spirit. Praying for you, every day. I know you can do this, but hate that you have to.
Oh, Susan, I hate to hear this. I hate, hate, hate to hear this. I will keep your spirits– and your surgeon’s skill– in my prayers.
Grrr. Sometimes I hate this world. I’m bummed with you that you have to deal with this.
What Kimberly said.
Thinking of you.
I’m sorry. Now go kick it’s @ss.
Effin’ cancer. That totally sucks, Susan. *hugs*, love, and prayers.
SO sorry to learn this, Susan. But at least it is local, rather than widespread. Keeping it contained is what the lymph nodes are for, thus they did their job, right?
Bummer that you have to fight this beast again, but as we all know, you will be the winner.
Best to you and your guys as you ready for this fight.
Thanks for letting us know. Many you may never meet are rooting for you.
You know that “local regional recurrence of breast cancer in the lymph nodes under my armpit” that you mentioned ? It’s ass is grass and we are the lawnmower. (It’s my standard line . . .;-)
Sending all my love and good thoughts to you as head into the next round of your fight and will do whatever I can to support you and your wonderful family!
Sending hugs your way.
Love to you.
Susan – you’ll be in my heart and mind until you beat this.
I hate this.
I know you will beat it but I hate that you have to go through this again.
I am here for you and your family. And you.
I love you.
I will be sending the best hope and wishes that I can muster. You can beat this!!
Crap. I’m so sorry. You know we’re here. Many hugs.
Sorry, Cancer. You’re going down. You picked the wrong corner of the world! Love to you. (Susan, not Cancer… it’s death to that.)
Crap crap crappity crap. But at least you know now what you are facing. Hoping and praying and wishing that everything goes as well as can possibly be and before we know it you are telling us you are all clear again. In the meantime, sending lots of hugs, love to WhyDaddy & the boys, and wishing like mad I lived closer and could be of practical help. Lots of love…
Damn. Cancer sucks. Sending major healing, surgery-reaching vibes.
I got your back, you know that, right?
Sending as much love, hugs, prayers, good thoughts, etc, as I can across the Beltway.
so many prayers being said for you and your family.
get your fighting gloves out of retirement and lace ’em up. i’m betting on you! 🙂
ditto, ditto, ditto to all of the above comments….
Susan,
You will beat this again. You will. We will all be praying and hoping and right behind you. We promise.
Well, d*mn it, this is infuriating. Definitely not the news I wanted to read but you are a strong person. A strong soul. {{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}
I was afraid to scroll down in my reader.
How dare that cancer show up again?!?! Stupid thing to ask I know. But for God’s sake haven’t you had to fight hard enough? Well, I guess cancer is pretty damn stupid because it doesn’t know what it’s up against, does it?
Sending hugs and prayers and anything else I can think of.
I’m wishing the best for you. Including a hairless armpit when this is all done.
BIG hugs. Now go kick some cancer ass. No way its gettin’ past this crowd (love the “its ass is grass and we’re the lawnmower” comment!). Hey I missed the Team WhyMommy thing last time around and I want my banner!!! Where can I get one?
Sending you love. Will be thinking of you on your surgery day, with hope that all goes well.
You will beat this, believe it. Huge hugs and we are all with you, every step of the way.
As my kids say, “NO FAIR!” We are stronger than cancer! Hugs to you and your family.
You have such a big army of women praying for you and sending you their strength. I hope you can feel it. Enjoy your mini-break, delight in your family, and come back rested and ready to fight. Love to you, my friend.
Damm Cancer,
Ok so you had a pet scan so you know its not else were right, Did you have any pain under your arms? and was all the pain you were having related in anyway to all this. Thankgod your PT told you to get a scan done. You are going to Knock this cancer on the head once and for all your so bravexx
I am at a loss for words except to say that your readers are here cheering for you. You have inspired me and given me strength during my own cancer journey and I’m sure you will continue to do so as you will beat this.
There are many women out there who have done fine with recurrences, especially regional ones. I just read about a woman who was diagnosed with stage II in 2000, had a stage IV recurrence in 2002 with mets to the liver, mets in 2005 to the brain, and is currently NED. Has been NED since 2008.
Repeat to yourself many times: it can be done and I will do it!!!!
We’re here for you.
crap … FU cancer!
I hate that your biopsy was not Benign. I can’t imagine facing the fight AGAIN – you have so much more knowledge than you had the first time around and that knowledge will help you … you are in my thoughts and prayers – I know they will do everything they can to reach and remove that difficult lymph node …
sending you a giant hug,
Doreen
Susan,
I am both very sorry to hear that you are going through this, and very very hopeful and encouraged that, now that IBC is much better understood, you will have very many happy and healthy years ahead of you.
Sorry for all the ‘very’s’.
You are a friend of a friend of a friend – so, we are friends twice removed?
Take care, and best wishes to you and your family,
Karen
I am annoyed but i know you will beat it. ((HUGS))
*hugs*
I signed up for Army of Women today, and shared it on Twitter and Facebook. It’s the very least I can do.
I just joined the Army of Women because of you! 🙂
i hate that it’s cancer. i’m glad that it’s local, and that surgery is soon.
you’re going to do this. you know how to do this. i’m so sorry you have to do it again, but hell, that cancer doesn’t know what’s coming for it. and we will be with you, for the big and the small, every step of the way.
love.
stupid, stupid, stupid stupid stupid cancer.
I totally and completely can’t stand it, and I wish it would just be gone. From you, from my other friends, from this universe.
And so we will continue to stand by you, my friend. And so my Relay for Life team will rock it out again this year, raising $$ for research.
((HUGS))
Hey, remember the first time around when you asked us to tell you about women who had kicked cancer’s ass? Well, the woman I wrote about is a 2X survivor and she is one of the strongest (physically and emotionally) people I know. I am so sorry for this news.But I know you are a fighter and your support team is at the ready. My love and good wishes to your family.
That sucks. I have nothing eloquent to say except that if anyone can be it, I think you can. Wanted to let you know I’m following your posts, pass it along to my friends, and hope for your best outcome all the time.
stupid cancer. it has no idea the power we have to unleash against it. I’m ready to fight with you!
Ohhhhh….we should talk. Yes, we should. I’m sorry I didn’t have time last Friday at the trunk show. My mom after 2 1/2 years is still fighting stage 4 unknown. You won’t believe what they think this cancer is from. Amazing what they find. Amazing what heppens when you question the doctors. Cancer sucks! I am right there fighting with you.
Chiming in to say f*ck that evil cancer! You go right ahead and beat the crap out of it! I am one of your anonymous readers who’s never commented and who anxiously looks forward to your every post (and made my husband drive 4 hours to take our son to Goddard because his fascination with astronauts – all because of your stories). Well, I looked forward to every post, except this one. I was so praying for a different message. I’ll keep praying…just ha ve to tweak my prayers a bit.
Aw, Susan, I hate this cancer. We will be here and support your fight. Warm thoughts to you and your family.
Hated reading this— but just a little bit less after reading all the comments from your Army of Women. Hope you feel a wave of love and inspiration after having inspired so many others..
You know we’ll be there. For you, for all of you.
We’re thinking of you. Big hugs to you my warrior friend.
Dusting off my Team WhyMommy badge, and ready to go to work. What do you need?
Take a good nap, strap on your boots and go kick it’s a**.
Not a very nice post for my first one? I’ll try harder next time.
Susan,
I want my words to you tonight to be something that you can use in your fight against your reoccurrence of IBC.
I contacted my personal oncologist, Dr. Massimo Cristofanilli – absolutely tops when it comes to this aggressive form of breast cancer. He has personally researched IBC for years and was instrumental in opening the first dedicated clinic for IBC in 2006, and then hosted the first International Inflammatory Breast Cancer Conference in 2008. He informed me that “A reoccurrence from IBC is never treated up front with surgery.”
I would like to suggest getting a second opinion and having your care overseen by someone that has personally treated the most cases of this very rare, and very aggressive form of breast cancer. You need someone that knows about the promising research that is happening with IBC before the studies are even published. You need someone that will not be conservative in their approach, but will present every possible option available to you in your fight.
Local therapy, when you are dealing with IBC that is already in the lymphatic’s, would not be a curative treatment. I know that you fear being on chemo again, but I am sure you fear more the thought of your sons being without their mother.
My last chemo treatment for my IBC was in pill form with very minimal side effects. It could be the same for you.
Please consider calling the new patient office number at Fox Chase Cancer Center in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, 215-728-3001, and asking for an appointment with Dr. Denlinger, who consults directly with Dr. Cristofanilli on all Inflammatory Breast Cancer cases.
You need to kick this cancer with the biggest hammer that you can find. Your fighting spirit and amazing support network will help carry you through.
look at all the love and amazing women right here beside you. You are such a strong woman. I know you will kick this ten ways to Sunday.. but I will also pray for peace and less stress. If you ever need anything. I’m here. xo
I am so sorry. I don’t post much, but I read all the time. I am heartened to see all the responses of support and positiveness. Many hugs and positive thoughts.
I am so sorry to hear this news. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I am dusting off my whymommy badge too. Hugs! Be strong you have all of us at your back.
the foam brick is out, and I’m pounding lymph nodes.
I’m not going to add much as everyone else has put it so well and I echo it all. Sending you and your family hugs and positive thoughts from across ‘the pond’.
thats bad news. I’m so sorry for you, now my own problems, like failing the chemistry test(what I did now, twice, so I have only one go left and then I’ll have to leave university)or the possibility of having to pay 700euros for additional term of university (because I’ll have to do another chemistry course), look really small and insignificant.
but the thing with the not-reachable node makes me some really bad feelings..is there really no way to reach it? cant they get it from somewhere else?
I really do hope that they get everything out. and I hope that you wont have to have the chemo or that you’ll get one that has few side effects,like Kelly writes some posts above..
please be strong for yourself, your kids and us.
we need you.
sending hugs and a lot of positive thoughts
Shit, shit, shit. Like everyone else commenting here (and on behalf of those who haven’t commented), I stand firmly behind you and have such strong faith in your resolve and perseverance. And in those moments when you might feel a bit discouraged about all of this cancer crap, know that you do have an army of women (and men) who support you and can lend you their strength. Yes we can.
Sending lots of positive thoughts. I hope the surgery goes well. You are a fighter….
I hate cancer! Glad for you that there might not be chemo. That is good news! Stay strong susan! We can beat this monster back!
I’m so sorry to hear that news. Sending positive thoughts and vibes your way for successful surgery and a complete recovery. (((hugs)))
We’ll all be willing that node straight into the surgeon’s path.
Hope and prayers and love for you and your family.
I’m so sorry…. it seems so unbelievably unfair to have popped back up like this.
I hope the surgery goes well and the node is rendered silent.
I have lurked around your site for over a year now, celebrating your sucesses with you, and I just wanted to say that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. You WILL beat this…..Lots of support and hugs your way..
I’m another lurker but just wanted to tell you that you’re in my thoughts and prayers and I hope the surgery goes well and you can finally put cancer behind you once and for all.
Susan, What can I say except add my support and prayers to your long list of admirers and say that you are one of my heroes.
This sucks.
Sending fighting support and prayers for you and your doctors!
You WILL win this!
So sorry to hear that. Keep on fighting! Sending much hope and love!
Dammit. That cancer sure likes to come back for repeated ass-kickings, doesn’t it? You’ve knocked it out before, you’ll do it again, but it’s unfair you have to go through the process again.
My prayers have been and still are with you. Please let me know what else I can do to be helpful. I’d even be willing to help Devra in her quest to reach that node!
Lemme know if your ass kicking shoes need a rub down at some point, in the meantime, sending Adirondack moxie your way. xoxo
Well, motherfuckin’ son of a bitch. All right then, shine up your cancer ass kicking boots. Sending hugs and prayers your way for a successful surgery and treatment!
I am so sorry ..
We Love you Susan.
Fight Susan. Like my Italian Grandfaher would say.
( he beat cancer 4 times ) It’s time to take it to the mats again !
You’re ready for the fight! We’re all behind you. Praying for a very successful surgery and treatment!
Hugs to you Susan, I hate to read this and I’m wishing you every strength to beat this again x
We will all be with you to fight the good fight and beat this thing into permanent submission!!
I just want you to know that we are here to support you. Obviously, judging by all of the comments, you must know that you are well loved and respected. We’ll help you any way that we can.
Came across your blog today after a visit to Stimeyland, and just want you to know that you have my support and prayers too! Research is the key!
Dear God,
Surround Susan with your light and love. Enter her heart and mind and give her the peace and understanding that she will be strong and able to do what she needs to do to get back to health. Enter her blood and lymph with only healthy cells and oxygen… no cancer, no clots; only nutrients which will nourish her and give her the stregnth to regain her health. God, bless her surgeons. Give them the ability to get to the deepest lymph node and extract all cancer in her body.
For this we will be eternally grateful.
Amen. Kathleen
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I’m so sorry Susan, I would trade places with you if I could .
Love You
Aunt Pat
Sending out healing vibes and best wishes – you’ve beaten this before, Susan, and I know that you can do it again. ((HUGS))
Ready to help. Love you!
Adding my voice to the ones here already. Love to you and your boys! ((((HUG))))
This sucks news sucks.
You are a fighter and are clearly surrounded by hundreds who will fight with you and for you in periods you must rest or don’t feel as strong as you are.
Hugs, hopes and prayers.
Not happy about this news. Hugs and prayers being sent your way.
[…] think of my friend Whymommy, fighting cancer for the second time in just under three years. i wonder about 3 am at her house […]
Thinking of you. Stay strong. xx
Dammit. I’m new here. I’ve experienced cancer only through women I love, so far, knock on wood and nutrition and supplements and etc… all the things we hope are helping. I will recommend an amazing website a friend used and I used with my own disease and surgeries:
lef.org
they have an amazing collective of documented, latest cutting edge information and research on every kind of disease you could imagine, including recommended protocols.
I’m sending hugs and prayers your way. Hang in there.
Oh Susan. Lots of prayers.
My heart is seriously with you today.
I’ve had this post open for 2 days, not quite sure what to say. I had been hoping beyond belief that it wasn’t cancer. However, I know you are going to fight this with everything you have.
All of us are here for you, and if you want any baby snuggles sometime before your surgery, just let me know!
sending you hugs and good wishes from Toronto
in the long line of people thinking of you and wishing you well.
I’ve never met you but I feel a connection to you because we share the mommy trait (and a fondness for science and blogging). I stand behind David in the very long line of people rooting for you. I hope to meet you in person before too long. GOOOO Susan!
fightfightfightfightfightfight
Rooting for you too
Oh honey. I am with you in spirit. When you need to rest, I will send fierce thoughts out into the universe for you. And when are fighting, I will send prayers for respite, calm, and peace. Xoxo
Sending you vibes to fight on and stay strong.
It’s funny – you are still Sam in my mind 🙂
I’m sending blasts of healing thoughts to those nodes.
It seriously is amazing how much we don’t know. But then again, bodies are incredibly complex. Good luck in your fight…
Susan, I don’t visit blog-land anymore. RL just takes up way too much time. However, I do check in on you from time to time, and I found myself checking in this evening. (Just to jog your memory, my kids and I were “STRENGTH” in the video get-well-card team whymommy made for you. BTW… I have that word hanging in my classroom… gets a lot of attention 🙂 )
You know how all powerful those healing thoughts and prayers are. Just know they’re a’comin’!! More than you can imagine, I’d guess! Take care… feel free to use my email if you need anything at all… I’m a great sounding board, should you ever need to just scream!!!
Wanted you to know that although I may not be around much, you are *never* far from my thoughts.
Love,
Jodie
Standing with you, and wishing it could be more. xoxo
Cancer sucks!
Hugs to you and your entire family.
X
Supa
Yes it does. We all need the research. Get better soon. Much love.
All my love to you. You will fight this.
F*ck cancer. Bring on the arsenal.
You’re going to kick this cancer’s can. You will. There’s no question of that.
If knowing that someone really cares
Helps healing along its way
Then I hope you now feel better
And keep improving, day by day..Love u
We’re here. We’re fighting with you, Susan. We love you!! XOXOX
Thank you, all. I’m here. I’m just off information-gathering and gearing up. Thank you all for your words of support and fight. We will, and we will beat this, I hope and I pray.
This makes me so angry! Grrrrr.
Love and light.
Bummer!!!
I’ll be cheering for you and your family for successful treatment. An old friend I saw at LPSC has come thru and is doing well.
I am glad that your docs have a good plan. Sending you love and good wishes.
I’m waving my pom poms and cheering “Go Team!”
I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers as you fight this next battle.
Pounding my fist high in the air and waving it like mad against this cancer. I know you can do this, again, Susan. My prayers for victory, comfort, and clarity are with you.
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Strength, courage and power to you Susan! You’ll be kicking ass and taking names come April, and we’ll all be here cheering you on!
Give those boys a cuddle from us too 😉 They’re learning so much now, and they’re learning perseverance, courage and love from you through all this.
I don’t even remember if I was one of the original 140+ commenters, but even if I was, I’m back again, to let you know I’m still thinking about you and sending you more strength and good energy.
Thinking of you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Susan, I just read your tweetstream backwards & came here to understand what was happening. You have all the resources avaiable to you – so much support and love. I am hoping that the 2nd opinion was approved by now, & if not, let us know we’ll kick up a viral blog & tweetstream against #anyfuckinginsurancecompanywe’llnamewhomesseswithour@whymommy !! You’ll beat this!
oh crap! you know we’re with you fighting with you!
I just found your blog and am so sad to hear your news. I was diagnosed with inflammatory BC in 2005 at the age of 31. I have a 2 year old daughter now. I think I have a pretty good idea of how you must feel. I’ll be thinking of you. I’ll be hoping for you.
I’m so sorry to hear that cancer is back! You keep fighting!
So sorry to hear it is cancer again. Cancer sucks and life in general isn’t fair 😦
Oh, Susan.
ARRRRRGGGHHHHH.
Love to you.
after being out of radio contact I am both sad and angry to read this…..I am sorry Susan
Sometimes I feel like Faith is going to think cancer is an inevitable fate, as probably 70% of our family (including my mom and dad’s closest friends) has it, has survived, or otherwise. It’s definitely the main topic at holidays and gatherings. In the past few years, I’ve prayed desperately for so many people I love – after freaking myself out on Google and reading about their cancer, their stage and their odds.. and I’ve seen miracles – flat-out miracles.
I *know* how strong you are. I know how much support you have – I know how many people care about you being better than just “okay.” I have complete faith you are a friend I can place on my list of miracles. I know you are already on my list of prayers.
Much love.
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